Archive for Dating Tips
I want what she has: What you can do to get it!
Posted by: | CommentsMy girlfriend has a fabulous marriage. She and her husband seem to be on the same wavelength about everything. They get along, share a lot of the same interests, do a lot of things together, etc. She tells me they have challenges just like any other couple, but they put their relationship as a top priority above all else. How can I create a great relationship with my partner — someone who doesn’t necessarily see it as a top priority? Where do I start and can I do things on my own that will make it great for both of us? Can you make a relationship great even if one of you is much more invested in it than the other?
Tonya in Terre Haute
Attracting what you want in your relationship starts with a vision. Picture in your mind what you really desire; feel the feelings you want to experience. Make sure you imagine yourself interacting and enjoying your relationship with your partner. Take it a step further and write your ideas on a piece of paper, focusing on all the things you want to see manifested for both of you. Consider creating a treasure map or vision board that includes pictures and other mementos so you can have a visual display to look at daily.
Start living into your vision by doing the things you want to experience in your own relationship. While not every relationship issue can be resolved by only one of you changing, it’s a great place to start. As Mahatma Gandhi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” It can start with you and just you. We learn and model our own behaviors and thoughts by the examples to which we’re exposed. It’s no different in our relationships. As you change, so will your partner.
Tara Kachaturoff
Goal: Meet my mate by such and such date
Posted by: | CommentsGoal: Meet my mate by such and such date
I read all this stuff about the law of attraction and setting goals and focusing on what you really want. Can you use this to set goals when it comes to dating? How can I meet the love of my life in 90 days? Is it possible to set a goal for something that seems so … well … fate driven? How do you do this? (please read this question carefully – she’s asking HOW to do this)
Susan in Seattle
Tara responds …
I think it’s absolutely possible to meet someone in 90 days – however, it’s not guaranteed. First, you need a clear vision of exactly what you want. Who do you want to meet? What are their values and vision for their life? What about physical, mental and emotional attributes? You also need to define your relationship requirements – the absolute, unwavering “must-haves.” The clearer your expectations, the easier it will be to “attract” the right person to you.
The next step is to take action. You can’t attract anything without taking action on your part. Even a magnet can’t attract anything until it’s placed in the environment of something which possesses properties which happen to interact with the magnet. You need to do the same thing by “standing in the way” of opportunity. This means you need to be social, engage in activities where you will meet singles, let family and friends know about your goal and your relationship requirements. The more activities and people you engage around your goal, the easier it will be to attract the results you desire.
The secret in a nutshell: Know what you want and then consistently and relentlessly take focused actions to achieve your goal.
Dating Tips: Be a Successful Single First
Posted by: | CommentsFinding a great date starts with you. If you want to increase your chances of meeting the right person for you, learn how to be a successful single.
Finding a great date, which eventually leads to a great mate, starts with you. However, before you get to that point, it’s important to be a successful single. Successful singles become successful couples.
Here are some tips to help you get started along the path to being a successful single …
• Love yourself. You’ll never be able to fully love or connect with another person unless you can love yourself as you are. This is a lifetime journey of personal exploration for 99% of us so don’t get discouraged if you don’t think you’re not as far along the path as you hoped. Make self-acceptance a top priority. The more accepting you are of yourself, the more compassionate and understanding you’ll be of others. The more you love yourself, the easier it will be to attract the right person to you.
• Learn how to be comfortable being alone – yes, all by yourself. Alone does not mean lonely. If you don’t like your own company, why would anyone else? Unfortunately, this is a serious problem in our society where many are driven to distraction so they never have to spend a quiet moment with themselves. It’s important to be able to do that. You need time to disconnect from the outer world to reconnect with your heart, feelings, emotions, and most importantly, to your thoughts about what you truly want for yourself and from life. Keep in mind that any future mate won’t be there for you 24/7. You wouldn’t want that anyway. You need to find inner peace with being alone and enjoying your own company. The more you can do that, the more a potential mate will want to do that as well.
• Get your life in order. Handle mental, emotional and other issues. If you’re stuck, enlist the help you need to move forward. There’s no badge of honor for being stuck, unhappy or overwhelmed. You need to take full responsibility for where you find yourself today, just as much as you need to take responsibility for where you’ll be in the future. After all, where you are today is the result of all the decisions that you’ve made up and until this point in time. Think about how empowering it is to know that tomorrow will be the result of what you do today.
Being a successful single takes effort. And, the efforts you put forth will be rewarded with a life that is yours to cherish. When you invest in yourself, others will want to do the same. Open yourself to attracting the right person to you by taking time to know yourself better. Be a successful single now, so you can be part of a successful couple later.
If you want to achieve better results, try a better method. Learn more about dating and relating so you can move in a new direction. It’s time to make some changes. Sign up to receive complimentary dating tips http://www.DailyDatingTipsForYou.com Tara Kachaturoff works with business professionals who want to find the love of their life and live the life they love. She’s also the author of Dating Success Tips for Singles: 52 Ways to Improve Your Relationships. Bonus Tip: The sooner you start, the faster you’ll be enjoying the life that you want and deserve. Get started, create your dating plan, and claim your success!
Finding a great date, which eventually leads to a great mate, starts with you. However, before you get to that point, it’s important to be a successful single. Successful singles become successful couples.
Contrary to popular belief, your life doesn’t miraculously improve when you’re in a relationship. Can it? Of course it can. In fact, a relationship can provide all manner of challenges and opportunities which can help you to grow and evolve, and in ways that you might not otherwise if you were single. Some mistakenly believe that things are easier when you’re a couple – perhaps some things are, yet some things aren’t.
In fact, when you’re part of a couple, things can be much more complicated. Now there are two of everything – two personalities, two life visions, two sets of values, ideals, and so on. There are more challenges and problems. It doesn’t mean that things are bad, there’s just more of everything when there are two of you!
The real opportunity in finding and creating a successful relationship, however, stems from your success as a single person.
If you don’t want double the trouble once you get into a relationship, you need to spend some time really understanding yourself. You need to be living a life you already love so that you can connect with someone else who is doing the same thing.
Are you doing what makes you happy? Are you living towards accomplishing the things which comprise your “big picture” vision for what you want for your life? Have you resolved or are you productively working towards resolving issues that may cause challenges in a future relationship? And, perhaps, most importantly, are you inspired and enjoying life to its fullest? If you can’t enjoy your life while you’re alone, you’re not going to magically change that fact once you’re a part of a couple.
If you want to achieve better results, try a better method. Learn more about dating and relating so you can move in a new direction. It’s time to make some changes. Sign up to receive complimentary dating tips http://www.DailyDatingTipsForYou.com Tara Kachaturoff works with business professionals who want to find the love of their life and live the life they love. She’s also the author of Dating Success Tips for Singles: 52 Ways to Improve Your Relationships. Bonus Tip: The sooner you start, the faster you’ll be enjoying the life that you want and deserve. Get started, create your dating plan, and claim your success!
Starting to Date Again – Next Steps After You Leave an Abusive Relationship
Posted by: | CommentsQuestion: How to avoid an abusive relationship?
I’m in my forties and ended an abusive relationship about a year and a half ago. I want to start dating again as I’m seeking a committed relationship, and one day, marriage. I want to select a better person next time. How can I make better dating choices in the future?
Laura in Lake Forest
I’m happy to hear that you’ve moved on from an abusive relationship. Life is much too short and precious to spend it with the wrong person. There are several things I would suggest doing to attract the right types of people. These suggestions require that you focus on yourself first. When we value and love ourselves, we can value and love others.
First, you might consider enlisting the services of a helping professional to gain more understanding of yourself. A trained therapist or counselor can help you uncover certain types of thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors that are not serving you well. Sometimes these are firmly rooted in our past. Only when you know what they are can you effectively do something about them – including changing them.
Next, I would work with a relationship coach who can help you understand who you are and the type of individual you’re seeking for a relationship. Creating a vision for your life, getting clear on your values and interests, and defining your relationship requirements, needs, and wants are just some of the empowering activities that you can work on together.
A coach will provide you with thoughtful feedback, questions for personal introspection, and a safe and confidential environment in which you can really map out the life you desire. By making plans and investing in your dreams and desires, you’ll feel incredibly empowered. You will begin to view and value yourself differently. This will not only change your perspective on yourself, life, and relationships, but also it will affect the type of energy you project to others. All of these things will play a role in attracting wonderful men to you – one’s who will treat you with respect at all times.
Keep in mind that this is a process. All good things take diligent thought and focused effort. And, most importantly, take your time and allow things to unfold in a gentle manner. You’ve made the most important decision already. You’ve moved out of an unproductive situation and began to focus on taking care of yourself first.
If you want to achieve better results, try a better method. Learn more about dating and relating so you can move in a new direction. It’s time to make some changes. Sign up to receive complimentary dating tips http://www.DailyDatingTipsForYou.com Tara Kachaturoff works with business professionals who want to find the love of their life and live the life they love. She’s also the author of Dating Success Tips for Singles: 52 Ways to Improve Your Relationships. Bonus Tip: The sooner you start, the faster you’ll be enjoying the life that you want and deserve. Get started, create your dating plan, and claim your success!